wrong number

today is back to the normal grind. the family festivities are over until next month. i'm still looking for a job, BUT i may get a position as a nanny. i keep trying to call the mom but she's either really busy or never home. i've left two messages and one email. hopefully i'll get a call later today to start soon.i need money.

i'm thinking about posting my progress and high and low weights and what not. i kind of feel like it's a huge step though. i hate being judged and i'm not as small as i want to be yet.i've seen some recent pictures of myself though,and i'm getting there.it would just be a huge step for me to be 100 % completely open and out there.

yesterday was the first read through of the show i'm working on. the auditions where on my moving day so i'm just the stage manager.which is pretty much the directer.only less recognition. the director is smokin'. he's a year older than me. he studied theater and dance...i don't have the gay vibe for him, and he made fun of me for saying ya'll...i DID live in the south for three years,so yea, i'm going to have some what of an accent and use the slang..for a little bit at least. back to him. he has blue eyes, blond hair, amazing body.puffy lips.tall.and is a director.i like it when a man tells me what to do :) haha.it really is a turn on though.
he told me i'll be running a few of the rehearsals next month..so we'll obviously have to meet up after to discuss the state of the show. my imagination runs sometimes.which is good.does anyone know pf any actors with out an active imagination? didn't think so :)

on wednesday i'm meeting a few friends at a restaurant called melt. it's a grilled cheese based menu, but luckily they have salad. and hopefully i can get away with not eating much.but these girls are smart.i'm sure they'll pick up on something.

i really need to run some errands, but i have frieking horrible cramps.i feel like i'm going to vomit every time i move my head.ugh.i really should be hitting up the job market, but i'm just in too much pain to do anything today.

my birthday is in one month and one day.i need to lose 10-15 pounds by then.my reward is going to be getting my navel pierced and 2 new ear piercing in the cartilage area.it's my 21st..i don't know if i want to get wasted or not. i mean, i do, but i don't want to gain any wait from alcohol.

and for every goal i meet, i'm putting money away to get a kick ass camera...one of those nikons that have that fancy lens and the cool shoulder strap.i'm a artsy nerd.feel free to make fun, i love who i am :) well, not the fat me.the artsy me.

i think this post is getting a little long, so i'm going to to bid you a farewell.